A Short Love Note to Cabin in the Woods

Just five college kids in an old abandoned cabin in the woods... Oh yeah!

I've been on a bit of a Joss Whedon tear of late, so you'll have to excuse me as I continue the trend with a glowing (albeit short) review of Cabin in the Woods. Written by Whedon and Drew Goddard (of Cloverfield fame) and directed by Goddard, Cabin in the Woods is a loving "spoof" of the horror genre. It begins with the typical horror movie set-up of five college students heading off to a cabin in the woods for a fun filled weekend of youthful shenanigans (I feel so old typing that), but what unfolds is anything but ordinary.

I'm going to be strict with myself about avoiding spoilers here because the less you know going in the more you'll enjoy Cabin in the Woods. I won't even post the trailer or the film's poster here because frankly they give away too much. All I'll say is that this film is a loving send up of the entire horror genre that engages in an intelligent, creative, and hilarious analysis of the acts of both making and watching horror movies. It's incredible, see it.

Beyond that it's hard to know what to say without spoiling things. In terms of the cast, numerous Whedon regulars are featured here including Kristen Connolly and the always amazing Fran Kranz (Topher!), as well as Chris Hemsworth (who continues to impress me with every role he takes on). There are also some additional roles that I won't mention here but are played by some fantastic actors, and once you see the film you'll know exactly who I mean. Everyone involved does a great job and understands their roles, which all include elements of horror and humour alike. It's a delicate balance but everyone pulls it off elegantly.

I should also clear up the whole "horror movie" thing. Cabin in the Woods is a horror movie more in spirit than effect, which is to say that it has a horror movie premise (kids go into woods, people die, there's blood, etc) but it isn't really horrific per se. There's only one shot that I would qualify as "gory" and it's really pretty tame. More than that the movie just doesn't focus on/feature the horrific elements: terrifying things occurs, granted, but they're more often played for laughs. Also the movie isn't shy about critiquing itself, both for depicting horrific events and for enjoying them, explicitly or otherwise. As I said, it's a delicate balance and I'll leave it for you to see it to understand it, but trust me: it works.

I think that's just about all I can say about Cabin in the Woods without giving anything away. It's an intelligent, hilarious, and endearing ode to the horror genre and film making/watching in general. It's definitely my favourite film of 2012 so far, and I can't wait to see it again. It's just an amazing movie. Don't go in expecting a slasher, it's so much more than that, and don't look into it because the les you know going-in the better. But definitely see it, because Cabin in the Woods is brilliant.

This Actually Happened: Alabama Teacher Used Assassination of Obama to Teach Geometry

A high school teacher in Alabama was reported for using the assassination of US President Barack Obama as an example to teach students about angles and parallel lines. Wow. I couldn't have made that up. The teacher is apparently not being fired though he has been placed on leave.

Joseph Brown, a senior in the geometry class.
, stated that the teacher "was talking about angles and said, 'If you're in this building, you would need to take this angle to shoot the president.' "

Reported (mostly) without commentary because the story says so much more on its own.

Found at Geekosystem via The Birmingham News

James Joyce's Incredibly Dirty Love Letters

I was perusing the Hark! A Vagrant archives this morning, as I am wont to do, when I came across an old favourite:

As this comic points out, the famed erotic letters James Joyce sent to his wife Nora are among the most hilarious and depraved pieces of writing ever conceived. Joyce uses his considerable literary talent to verbally assault himself and his "little frigging mistress," and describes how he wants to "fuck fuck fuck fuck my naughty little hot fuckbird's cunt for ever." It's all very lewd and personal but since both parties are long dead we are free to chuckle at their private correspondences.

Or so I thought. When I was first told about these letters in 2008 they were widely available online, but when I tried to search for them this morning they seemed to have all but disappeared. Perhaps the Joyce estate has deemed the letters detrimental to the great author's legacy and had them taken down. Perhaps I was merely looking in the wrong places. Eventually I was able to find them here, but the nature of the link fails to inspire confidence in its long-term reliability. As such I am including the text here in full for the sake of posterity.

I should warn you again that the letters are extremely graphic and Not Safe For Work by any standards. Also, for those of you with high moral standards, it should go without saying that once you have read these documents you will never be able to un-read them, and the perverted ghost of James Joyce may haunt you as in the comic above. That said, you can find them after the break.

Wes Anderson's 'The Amazing Spiderman'

This video is hilarious. Admittedly this is less a lampoon of Anderson's style and more just a mash-up of Rushmore and The Royal Tenenbaums, but it's still really funny.

How It Should Have Ended: Transformers 2

The "How It Should Have Ended" video series is pretty hilarious. The reimagining of the Superman ending is still probably their funniest entry, but almost everything they've ever done is worth watching. I'm not totally sure that this is new, but today I found the ending they put together for Transformers 2. Given how much I've discussed the ridiculous number of things that are wrong with that film, it would seem wrong not to post this:

Enjoyable Things: Zombieland Review

Throughout Zombieland, we are repeatedly told that there are rules to surviving in a world overrun by the undead. Of all of them, the final rule, No. 32: Enjoy The Little Things, is without a doubt the most important one. This light-hearted moral is emblematic of Zombieland since that is exactly what the film asks, nay demands of its audience.

Zombieland comes in the midst of a proliferation of zombies in mass culture, and yet manages to separate itself from the horde, er, crowd. Unlike almost every other zombie narrative out there, Zombieland features characters that take as much pleasure in dispatching the undead as we do in watching them do it. This slight change to the formula dramatically alters the atmosphere of the film, and more importantly its relation to all other zombie films.